how to change your life

whether they agree or not

January 9, 2025 by Sarah Faith

christian, christian blog, christian life, do hard things, following the inner nudge, how to change your life, how to find purpose in your life, how to live a peaceful life, how to show up, mental health, mental peace strategies, mindset, purpose driven, purpose driven life, self care, self-care for women

i’d say it’s about once a week that someone mentions something related to me “quitting” music… they ask me why, they ask about my business, why i’m doing that instead of music, mention how sad it is that i’m not performing music anymore, etc. etc. trust me. i feel it, too. i grieve it, too. ((shameless plug, did you know that i am actually still creating music…? i put a brand new song out in November called “saved by the blood – go check it out if you haven’t!)) ((i’ve decided the new direction / genre is called “swamp gospel” — i hope you can dig it!!))

and i guess i don’t really ever feel the need to explain, however, i do wonder if maybe there’s a chance to relate to you through this path i’ve been taking.

i don’t know if you’ve ever been doing something, only to find that maybe it wasn’t what it seemed like it was going to be on the surface when you started. or maybe you started going in a direction, it was good for a while, even great sometimes, but then something inside you just started tugging you another way. things change. if you’re from a place where seasons exist, you know that seasons change… and sometimes things need to be let go that you otherwise in a hundred years wouldn’t have dreamed of letting go of.

there’s also this crazy, silly analogy my husband uses about penguins. you have penguins and you have an island. you have an island full of penguins. at a certain point, the laws of math and geometry are going to kick in and there’s truly only room for so many penguins on said island. the others are left to either jump off willingly and go to their own island, or fall off… either way, all the penguins aren’t staying on that island. it’s just not possible.

for me, in this stage of life, i’ve only got room for so many penguins on my island. and maybe you’re in a season right now too where the stress level is really high, and what you really need is a long sit in a quiet room to ask yourself if all these penguins on this island really belong here… do they? do they all need to stay? or would you feel better, lighter, more purposeful if you let go of some of the penguins?

if possible, try to temporarily let go of all the feelings of failure and inadequacy you might experience in the “rehoming” of these penguins… maybe some are going to need to be permanently rehomed, while others are temporary! you don’t have to have it all figured out right this minute, but you do deserve to experience a higher level of peace… especially if you’re causing your own unrest by simply refusing to put something down.

music is a good thing. performing music is a good thing. being a musician is something i am so grateful for, it’s such a great thing. i love writing music, making music, performing music, sharing music… but i love so many other things that have been gifted to me by God’s grace, mercy, and kindness, and i’m on a mission to make sure i’m stewarding my time and my resources well. and we’re not all called in the same direction — that’s something i’ve had to come to terms with, too. it does me no good to compare what others are doing to what i’m being called to — they’re apples to oranges.

here’s another angle of perspective for you — if you’re feeling nudged to give something up that feels really big, and heavy, and weighty, and important… wouldn’t it make sense that whatever you’re being asked to give it up FOR is Bigger, Heavier, Weightier, and More Important? for a while, nothing seemed more important to me than making a career or myself in music… and my eyes opened wider, and something inside shifted… at first i didn’t quite know what to do with it… but as i took steps in fear, it became clearer and clearer. i don’t think i have the full spectrum of the picture, even still, but i do know that i’m in the right place, doing the right things.

i’ve got the same goals as before — love people, make things for people, help people… whether it’s through a song, a blog, a social media post, or a bottle of shampoo, i’m still doing it. and i’m so grateful to do so. i’m equally if not more grateful for the family i get to be a part of while i’m doing all of those things. nothing matters more to me on this earth than God, my husband, and my kids… and if there’s some version of necessary shift in me that’s required in the name of any of those three avenues, the benefits far outweigh the costs.

whatever situation you find yourself in, whatever compromise you’re feeling like you have to make… you’re going to make the right choice. you’re going to make the hard choice. and you’re going to realize that you made exactly the right choice. choices like this aren’t meant to be easy – if it was easy, there’d be no growth opportunity tied to it. things that are hard are the things that are calling you higher. i’d encourage you to lean into that.

and hey. i’m super serious about sitting alone for a long time in a quiet room. that step is not optional.

i celebrate the difficult decisions you’re making — there’s joy and freedom on the other side.

♥, SF

new year, better me

i saw this saying the other day somewhere in social media land and it resonated with me a whole lot. it’s not a new me. it’s a better me. a stronger me, a me with better habits, a more faithful me, a more grounded me, a more surrendered me… a clearer vision, more boldness, more prayer, and more action.

what does a new year do for you? does it make you anxious? excited? does it spring you into action or hold you in place? does it pump you up or grieve you? do you find yourself looking forward or backward?

pro tip – as much as it’s possible, try not to look back. you’re not headed there. you have to find a way to get a forward-oriented direction.

this year, God gave me the word “go” as my 2025 “theme” so to speak. i had it on my to-do list to make a vision board. honestly, i made one for the first time last year and i’m not sure i’ll do it again. i do have a master plan i will be creating that guides me monthly and quarterly, but i’m not sure about the vision board concept. i know that might sound weird – i know they say visualization is key. we’ll see if i create one or not — check back with me in a week or so and ask me if i ever ended up doing it. haha

i was on a call with my mastermind group and we were talking about words for the year — when it came to be my turn, i honestly didn’t feel like i had a word at first, but i was encouraged to just let the first word the came to mind, come forward and have weight. it was “go.” when i said it out loud, my mentor said, “yes, Sarah. the word i felt and heard for you was ‘execute’.” that’s what “go” means for me this year – this is the year i take bold action, bolder than before, more grounded, steadfast, rooted action. this is the year that i move, create, and trust that i’ve got everything i need to create the visions and dreams placed inside of me. i’m lacking nothing. i need no permission, special skills, or special abilities. i’ve got what i need and it’s time to go.

if it serves you to think that a new year must mean a new you, then by all means, go with that, but i would also love to encourage you to not feel the need to buy into that. you don’t have to be a new you. maybe you just need to be a more focused you, a more disciplined you, a you with better habits than last year, a you that doesn’t listen to fear or that inner critic as much. a you that gives up the excuses and does the dang thing. a you that doesn’t listen to the judgments and nay-saying of others as much. a you that doesn’t put stock in your limiting beliefs and those thoughts that keep holding you back. maybe you just need a better morning routine. maybe you just need better friends. maybe it’s better boundaries. nothing inherently new – just better. don’t put so much pressure on yourself to be this new shiny creation – you were fearfully and wonderfully made. no need to reinvent the wheel. maybe just a couple improvements here or there is all that’s in your way.

i don’t know if that helps you at all today, but i hope it does. i don’t know who it’s for… maybe it’s you. maybe you just need permission to shed the weight of the expectations, whether outer or inner, and just be free to still be you, and maybe your 2.0 version isn’t as heavy as you’re making it. maybe what actually needs to happen is less… less expectations, less self-judgment, less demand to live up to this proverbial hype… and permission to just be. be exactly what and who you were created to be, not what you think will satisfy some undefined standard this world told you to try and live up to.

i wish you the best in everything. happiness, love, life, family, fulfillment… and oftentimes we think that means we need more, when really, we actually need less. maybe less is more is truly what makes more better.

♥

me vs. me

i looked at the calendar this week and was shocked that it was the end of November already. i’m not sure how we got here… so close to 2025, yet still so many things i feel like i’d still love to accomplish this year.

maybe that’s you as well. maybe it’s been a long year, one that you can look back on and see that while a LOT of things happened, there’s still things left to tackle. and man, i really want to blame the circumstances. but i know that’s not really fair. or even true.

this isn’t the first time i’ve felt like this, and it probably won’t be the last. because the true issue is that it’s me vs. me. i’m the one that got in the way often times. i’ve got so many dreams, so many aspirations, so much drive… and sometimes, at the end of the day, i can honestly say that i’m not sure how to reach them because of two things: 1. i’m relying on myself, my own strength, and my own ideas too much and 2. i’m trusting in the actual possibility of these things happening too little.

bold statement: overthinking will kill your dreams. it will kill your motivation. it will just suck every ounce of energy you have if you let it. this is probably another one of my biggest opportunities for growth, although i will say that i’ve proven to myself time and time again that action is the way over this hurdle. even if it’s messy. even if it doesn’t make sense. there’s a certain kind of “magic” that happens when you’re putting energy out… it comes back around. stagnation breeds more stagnation, but action shakes things up. it’s like this saying that i’ve heard that has stuck with me for a couple years now: “God can’t steer a parked car.” there’s no specific direction in that statement. you just have to move. He can help you with the rest, but you do have to take some action. i do need to get out of my own head long enough to take a step forward. there’s always room to take a step sideways if you need to redirect, but if laws of inertia are true, motion is the first order of business. an object at rest will remain at rest.

maybe you’ve been here a while and you’ve heard me talking about self-care. this is another reason i think self-care is so dang important. especially this time of year. sometimes it may not connect that it has anything to do with anything else, but it DOES. you’re in motion. you’re moving. you’re thinking. you’re giving yourself space. doing a hair treatment or a skincare routine isn’t just about how my hair or skin look. it’s about my thoughts and giving myself that time to create space in there. this brain is so jam packed full of so much stuff on any given day, it’s like a dang circus. i need a minute to calm the monkeys and put out the fires. there’s magic to be found in that space! but you can’t get the space if you don’t make it. it’s too busy and crazy and chaotic of a life. and i don’t even have kids in this house all the time! so i really don’t know how the rest of you normal people do it.

easy things that help me create space:

gratitude + bible time in the morning
double washing my hair in the shower
morning and evening skincare routine
going for a walk
getting dressed in something i’d like to wear
taking a few extra minutes to fix my hair
turning on worship music

things that DO NOT CREATE SPACE

doing more things than i have the capacity for
scrolling more
thinking that the anxiety goes away by continuing to take on more
convincing myself there’s no time to take even 5 deep breaths
hyper focusing on my to-do list
equating my to-do list with success

notice how the things that create space are not really related to what we consider “progress” at all. they’re separate. they’re different. they’re kind of not even in the same neighborhood. but your brain needs it. trust me. your body needs it. trust me. it’s not the to-do list that’s going to give you peace. ever. i love getting things done, but not at the expense of my mood and physical well-being. though sometimes i forget this and work myself silly anyway… i’m working on this, too.

i guess what i’m saying is… taking these last 45 days of the year to put yourself on blast and guilt trip yourself for your failures isn’t going to create any kind of last minute progress. i don’t feel anyway… it’s certainly not a recipe for propelling you into a better 2025. what i would do is take some small actions day by day that get you in motion. i broke some promises to myself this year, too. some feel in my control, and some don’t. either way, all i can do is create the space and get the car moving. once there’s space to actually think, i think the direction becomes a lot clearer and kind of starts to take shape on its own.

i just gotta move first. because when i’m stagnant, it’s me vs. me.

what i tell myself

no fluff to start this blog, because it’s worth just jumping in. there’s no way to count the number of false things i’ve told myself in this life — stories, lies, opinions… way too many. and that’s not the punchline. that’s not the worst part. the worst part is when i believe them. and that i’m not alone.

it’s been so heavy on my heart this week the absolute number of people that are in this boat. truth is it’s not one that’s floating. it’s a sinking ship. one that we’re apparently willing to drown on. you need to get off the boat. you need to take a leap and get off of the ride. get. off. the. ride.

how many times are we going to wake up and say “man, i wish this looked different,” or, “wouldn’t it be nice if…” but do nothing about it? make absolutely zero effort to walk in that direction. we live in a wild world, but we still don’t live in a world generous enough to just give that vision to us without movement on our part. no matter how crazy it gets out there, i doubt it’ll ever be that philanthropic.

my heart breaks for every single person that wants different, can see different, and chooses a comfortable misery instead of putting forth a 1% better effort to improve their situation. i think you’re making it harder than it is. i think you think you have to have it perfectly figured out. let me be the one that takes your hand and assures you that you’re sorely mistaken. there’s no demand of perfection, you just have to give, try, believe, and let the discouraging thoughts rattling around in your head take a long walk off a short pier. success isn’t the person who gets it all right on the first try. it’s the person that gets it wrong three or four times, then gets it right, and learns a few good lessons along the way. be willing to be wrong. be willing to screw it up.

every day, there are probably thousands of people looking for ways to change their lives… and too many of them see a possibility and write it off immediately for lack of self belief or faith that there’s any reason any of that would ever come true. maybe i’m making this up, and maybe you actually know the reason, so what is it?

let me tell you about lack of self-belief. lack of self-belief is a girl who at the age of seven was abused by her mother. and that’s just the earliest memories. maybe it was earlier. the divorce happened when she was five. her dad started to see the abuse so he started fighting for custody. you would think that battle would have been kind of cut and dry. it’s a pretty simple story when alcohol is involved. but it wasn’t. not at all. the custody battle went on for five years. five long years. multiple attempts. multiple failures. multiple reasons to believe that maybe this is just “how it is” and reasons to give up completely. but the verdict was finally turned.

lack of self-belief is being kicked out of your house by a mother who’s “done fighting” for you, won’t get sober, and thinks the answer is abandoning ship instead of getting clean. lack of self-belief is believing every single story that a teenager creates about herself in the aftermath of this kind of disaster… who’s even considered ending life altogether… and is somehow still here, for some reason.

you see… i am you. i was you. i’ve wanted to quit more times than i can count. but it’s just ultimately not the answer. it’s not the story. it’s not where this plot twists. there’s more to the story. but i realized that it was absolutely, 100% never going to change unless i did. the legacy didn’t magically change. God literally picked me up with own His holy version of the jaws of life and said, “nope, you can’t have this one.”

so… i don’t say “get up, let’s go,” in vain. i don’t say it from a place of unknowing. i know how it feels. i know what it’s like. i know every debilitating detail of a million pounds of anxiety and depression weighing down on you, convincing you there’s no possibility of movement or improvement. and it’s all a lie. it’s an illusion. and the power you get to walk in when you defy every single negative thought that plagues your brain is absolutely indescribable.

permanent? no. cured? not entirely. but the voices weaken. they quiet. they settle. they lose power. they lose steam. the trick is not giving them the ammo or the focus they’re craving. ever tried not thinking of an apple when someone tells you not to think about an apple? your brain doesn’t work in negatives. this gives you the power. you shift your focus, you shift your energy, and the things that try to hold you down lose their grip on your life.

i could literally write about this for 600 more paragraphs… i won’t do that. just know you’re more powerful than you think. braver than you know. and meant for more than you can imagine.

i’d love to help you if i can. if any of these words are helpful, i’m honored to have written them. maybe there’s a leap you can take that would hold your feet to the fire and start this train moving in the right direction. i’m here for the encouragement, if that’s useful to you. <3 do something. move. you’re not a tree. join me. come be in the spaces i like to hang out that help me keep this kind of belief and fire. dark can’t drive out dark – only light can do that.